Relationships are arguably one of the most important parts of the human experience.
We have an innate need to feel understood and loved by others in order to thrive. Without these types of connections, people tend to feel lonely and isolated. Many people question their self worth. The process of understanding another person so deeply and caring about them so much that you commit to moving forward together is a vulnerable leap for many. And getting hurt after that leap can be devastating to trust. You may feel like all you do is argue. Or you may question if this person is right for you at all.
You wonder if it would be easier to go at it alone.
To Stay or Go?
Couples tend to seek help when they are at a crossroads. They generally are each stuck in their ways and they can no longer communicate with each other. In relationships, we frequently fall into patterns of communicating that perpetuate a cycle.
How you might be feeling...
You may feel like no one is listening, like you have no patience anymore or you can feel resentment growing. Sometimes, an unforeseeable event leads you to feel even less connected with your partner and leaves you both wondering whether you should even stay together.
At this point, some couples move toward divorce and some couples seek help.
How We Can Help
We have therapists trained in identifying patterns of disconnection. We help couples see where they are turning away from their partners and guide them to turn toward one another instead. Many people come to therapy hoping that the therapist will just tell their partner that they are wrong, but this isn’t how we work. We are part of the team of the couple and work hard to understand each individual within the unit’s perspective. From that vantage point, we can best understand what they each need and help them be heard.
This form of therapy can be hard work. It means accepting that your relationship is worth fighting for and coming in to hear and say hard things. It means listening to your partner and accepting them for who they really are. We frequently hear from couples that they learn things about their partner that they never knew. That they found a side of their partner that they did not know existed. That they understand each other.
When a significant relationship is in danger it tends to feel like an emergency. We are here to help you understand where to focus your energy and how to see each other again. We have seen the difference that therapy can make in what feels like a broken or damaged relationship and we know that the only way into a better place is for the whole team to put in the work. We have helped many couples identify a path forward to a place where they find joy in their relationship again. Where they see each other again. Where they love each other again.
Let us on board, we can help.